listening to the crowd.

I saw people around me, but none of them was you. I tried hard to find you, but the people won’t let me pass through. They told me it was wrong to go and look for you. Cause if I insist on doing, I’ll only stumble and fall. So I asked those many people, of what I can do. They told me to let you be, and have my own way through.

—->

I got lost in the middle of a plaza, and never did you appear. I cried and asked the people, and they said it clear. “He will always going to tell you, that he’ll always be there for you. But now look at you, have you found him? He is just there so it seem. But listen to me dear, your decisions begin here.” I stood up and left them all and never said a word. Is it true I am alone now? Let me see… I guess it’s true.

—->

I went in circles all day and never sighted you. Again I asked the people and sternly they say too, “If you don’t mind us saying, you should act less for him. You do so much so many. Remember yourself too. If you want to stay with him, then better act as his friend. You are not his sister or darling. So these things just come depend. Lessen your persistence, and act more mature. Perhaps then he’ll understand, that’ll he’ll be good without you”. I cried upon hearing. I guess they were right. This is just the beginning of a long tiresome night…

—->

The day next came uninvited to my weary weak eyes. And a hand suddenly appears before me. I looked up and saw you by. You ask me what I was doing, and that where I have been. You told me you tried to come and pick me, but I was never I the place. I asked people if they saw you. and they told me things. Then I bowed my head remembering. Those words they did say. You sat just beside me and whispered in my ear, “You listened to them too much. Have you even thought that I’ll come?” I answered, “Of course yes.” But you shook your head again, you said, “You listened too much to people, and forgot to hear yourself. If only you believed me, then you could just see. I was at the back of the fountain, just by the other side where you’ve been.”

—->

I bowed my head in silence, trying to realize things. “You were at the back of the fountain? What were you doing there? I tried to find you all day, but didn’t track you still. If all day was been given, it means you just waited for me? Did you even try to find me, instead of just standing there.” you started pouring out words, to justify your side. I said I’m just too tired to listen to it now. I stood up and started walking, far distance from you. “Just too tired to listen? Then why not listen to yourself.” Those are the words you hollered as you pulled my arm aback. “You’ve been listening to people, when will you listen to yourself? You told of once you’ll never let others decide your own fate. But now look at you, it’s the opposite I can say.” I just stared right back at you as you continuously said, “The question here is if you would stay, or leave me to my worse.” I answered, “I’ll stay with you of course but still, I have to tell you something. There are things my heart is saying, and words that are so loud.

Well guess what, “I’ll be listening to the crowd.”

i was the “people” i am talking about after all. fuck life.

toodles.

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~ by protagonist on July 10, 2008.

6 Responses to “ listening to the crowd.”

  1. i agree. You have to listen to yourself dawg. Don’t let your thoughts eat you. Remember, you still have your heart. Oh my, am I making sense?!

  2. yeah right. whatever.

  3. ++i found myself along with the crowd, realizing I’ve been mingled with them and we became one. So I told myself that I was just another jerk up the street. Maybe it’s the crowd fault to interrupt my words, because while I’m away finding you, I heard that crowd shouting and in myself i was saying.. “I don’t have to ask anybody,no matter else would it takes.. we’ll meet and never again separate ways++ ^^

  4. FTW!!! so deeeeeep 😡

  5. hmm… yeah!.. ur definitely………………… ryt?^^

  6. hahahahahaha. Those who listens to the crowd gets lost in it. ^_^ hahaha, am i even making a sense here? lol

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